Dear Kemi,
I am 24 years old but I was forced into having
sex from the age of six by a cousin, who lived with us. I am the last child
after two males and due to the nature of my parents’ professions; I was left in
the hands of my then 16-year-old cousin. We did this frequently till he gained
admission into the university. Now, I am planning getting married soon but I
have a problem with my fiancé, who is 30 years old. He loves sex and wants it
almost every day. The last time I refused him, he forced me and this was very
painful. Sometimes, I think I am not interested in sex because of my past and
whenever I am forced, I feel pains in my private part. I am so afraid to go to
the clinic because I am a very beautiful person but I don’t want my past to
hunt me. Hope this will not affect my marriage?
K.O,
Lagos
Your past will affect your future as long as you
don’t let go of it. I think it is high time you had a discussion with your
fiancé and let him know what you feel when forced into having sex. You should
also see a doctor, your beauty notwithstanding. This should also serve as a
lesson to busy parents who leave kids in the hands of relative or staff and get
them abused. Training a child is more than giving money or providing luxuries.
If there is a good communication link with your kids, they will alert you when
abused by anybody. Young lady, try to let loose your mind from whatever abuse
you suffered as a child and abstain from your almost daily sex with your
fiancé. You are not married to him yet and he should learn to respect your
opinion and your body. If he is truly getting married to you soon, why the rush
for sex? Talk to him, sort this out before you end up in a marriage of abuse.
No comments:
Post a Comment