Work With Your Spouse Without Stress

Working with your spouse is no bad idea after all. But depending on how you look at it, it’s either the greatest thing you could imagine or the worst thing that could ever happen to your relationship. How can this be done?

1.         Separate home and work
Your home and work relationship are not on same pedestal, therefore, they should have different dynamics. What is most important is that whatever happens at home doesn’t carry over to work, and vice versa. Don’t bring your home life to work.

Soji: We work together but we have a management that is in charge of our businesses. Our concern is the home front. My wife and the children are important. At home, it is love and how to take good care of them. When we get to the office, we discuss business.

Tope: For us to be in the ministry for over 15 years is by the grace of God. The administration of the ministry has been assigned to my husband and I don’t poke around at all. Mine is to prepare for programmes. Whenever he gives the signals that all is set, I am ready. If there is a need for any material— either for my own use or for the home— I make a request and he provides.At no point in time did we ever quarrel over business issues.

Tope Alabi is a gospel artiste, she is married to Soji

2.         Be respectful

Keeping work and home separate is made easier if you are always respectful of one another. This goes for both home and work. Always be respectful of your partner at home, and remember your “please” and “thank you.” At work, even if one of you is subordinate to the other, maintain that respect.

Sunday: It is fun working together and I do not treat her any differently from other cast. If maybe she does not get her lines right, I shout at her and we quarrel about that a lot. In fact, I am harsher on her and she will tell me later that I did not have to shout on her in the presence of everybody. I just tell her it is because I want the best out of her

—Sunday Adewale is married to Toyin, an actress

3.         Find ways to maintain your individuality
Sometimes when couples work too closely, they find it difficult to maintain a sense of identity and individuality. Make sure you get enough alone time, even if it’s just to be alone with your thoughts. Everyone needs a little space.

Tope: Over the years, we have shared one office but recently, I moved to my shop. I am into clothing and accessories. In spite of the fact that we are in the same office, certain things that people expect to trigger a conflict never do. When we are at work, we take away the fact that we are couple and relate like colleagues would do.

Tope Duker is married to movie producer, Fidelis Duker

Shun jealousy

Every talent that translates to a profession produces a star. If your spouse is the ‘star’ , understand that he/she will be the centre of attention. Let him/her live the status and shun petty jealousy.

Gbenga: I have always been involved in my wife’s career from day one of marriage. I took over her management, handled all her legal affairs and so on. It has not stopped my law practice in any way. Do I get jealous of her male fans? No. She gives me no reason to entertain fears at all! The truth is, knowledge of your spouse will determine your state of mind

—Gbenga is married to Lara George, a gospel artiste