JUST SINGLES

Before he punches you

Lara wears a false tooth and it cost a fortune to acquire one. Everyone says it looks good on her. However, she ought not to have any business visiting a dentist but Jide, her boyfriend, gave her a punch on the mouth during one of their numerous squabbles.

 “Jide and I have been together for almost three years and he beats me at the slightest provocation. The first time he hit me was three months into our relationship. He bought me several gifts and even sent his sister to plead with me saying it would never happen again. Now, I have lost count of the number of times he has hit me and I fear for my life. Anytime I threaten to leave him, he, in return, threatens to kill me if I dare it. Already I am thinking of relocating to another town because I no longer feel safe,” she says.

Nkechi does not seem to know what she wants and that is why her friends have left her to her fate. Dave, a man she is supposed to be getting married to in a few months, has proved to be the devil himself, judging by the intensity with which he abuses her physically. Efforts by her family and friends to make her leave him yield no fruit because she believes he beats her because he loves me.

“Dave is not a bad man, he hits me because I have done wrong and he feels the only way he can correct me is to give me a few jabs,” explains the distraught spinster.

Ask Amina, she would tell you that Adam is the most loving man she has met but she would not forget to add that he is also the most brutal man that she has crossed path with. “He is a very jealous man and easily gets suspicious. A few weeks ago, I ran into my cousin, Mike, who I had not seen in up to a decade. We embraced warmly like long lost lovers and it was at that moment Adam appeared and in an instant began to slap Mike. I tried explaining that he is a relative of mine but instead of listening he pounced on me and beat me black and blue. Not his first time, these beatings have become too frequent but my parents have said that they will not live to see me quit the romance just because he is responsible for their upkeep.”

Let’s get talking

Ladies you are too precious and beautiful to allow a man pummel you. Often regarded as the weaker sex, women are unquestionably the greatest victims of physical and emotional abuse. The most damaging abuse is emotional abuse because it can be more difficult to overcome. If your man is emotionally abusing you, please get out of the relationship.

There are too many men who emotionally abuse their women and do not see the tremendous damage   they are doing to them. Most of these men follow up emotional abuse with physical violence. It starts with a push, a slap and then it graduates to blows and then you are left with a black eye, bruised arms and with time you find yourself hospitalised. Some women even lose their lives in the process.

To the bachelorettes, know that if he hits you once, he is never going to stop. No amount of begging or cajoling should stop you from making the dash. A woman beater is a potential murderer, so run!